Buffy The Vampire Slayer/Hellboy: Part 1 (no sex)
by The Fan ([email protected])
He was a rather strange being. The offspring of Archdemons from the very Pit
of Hell itself. He was summoned from his native realm by the Nazis. The Nazis
wanted a weapon of unprecedented power to use against the Allies back in the
1940s as World War II raged across the planet. The Nazis summoned a fledgling
demon and captured it. The fledgling demon was wrenched from Nazi hands by a
group of men from the American secret service. Leading them was Professor
Bruttenholm. The man who took him in and basically treated him as he would a
son. He named the fledgling demon Hellboy.
Hellboy, a creature born in the Fires of Hell has come to Earth. He was
raised by humans. Hellboy grew up in the Centre, a place kept by the Bureau
for Paranormal Research and Defense. The Bureau turned Hellboy into the
ultimate weapon. In the decades since he was stolen from Hell as a child,
Hellboy grew into a six-foot-six, red-skinned, horned man-like creature. A
devil of a man or a manly devil, depending on how you looked at it.
The Bureau kept Hellboy as its Number One Agent. It had other supernaturally
gifted operatives, such as the amphibious and telepathic Abe Sapiens and Liz
Sherman, a young woman with Pyrokinetic powers. The Bureau was waging a war
against the Forces of Darkness. A war that the rest of humanity knew nothing
about. The world did not know that Hellboy existed. The Bureau had its hands
full with its enemies. The villainous Grigori Yefimovich Rasputin had
achieved immortality and proven to be more of a pain in the neck than ever.
Ilsa Hauptein was a very dangerous woman with strange abilities.
Currently, Hellboy was on assignment. He was in the town of Sunnydale,
California. He was hunting something very strange. A Fyarl demon. The
creature was seven feet tall, humanoid and covered with armor. It was
one of those old breeds of demon that hardly ever showed their faces
above ground. The Bureau knew there was a lot of demonic activity in
California. That's why they sent Hellboy. Hellboy had been surprised
when his Boss sent him to sun-drenched California. When he stepped into
the Sunnydale night life, he found that maybe he was in the right place
Hellboy ran after the Fyarl demon. He chased the beast for several blocks and
still it did not show any signs of tiring. Hellboy had a lot of stamina, the
kind a racehorse would envy. But endlessly chasing a centuries-old monster
was beginning to wear him down. He leapt into the air, leaping a hundred feet
off the ground, vaulting over a building and landing on the other side, in
front of the prey he was chasing. "Hi, miss me?" Hellboy said to the beast.
The Fyarl demon looked at Hellboy, and hissed.
"I'll take that as a no." Hellboy said as he whipped out his gun. He fired.
The bullet hit the demon, and it growled. Hellboy watched the bullet sink
into the creature's skull, then the wound closed and healed itself right
before his very eyes. "Fast healer, huh?" Hellboy said.
The Fyarl demon roared, and charged. Hellboy raced to meet his charging
adversary. The two collided. Hellboy struck the demon with his fist, forcing
it to get back. The demon howled in pain and roared, stretching massive jaws
and charging at Hellboy. Hellboy leapt at his enemy and caught its muscular
neck in his superstrong arms. The creature twisted and struggled but
Hellboy's strength was too great. The creature was no match for Hellboy when
it came to raw physical strength. Hellboy kept twisting, and broke the
creature's neck. The Fyarl demon lay still at Hellboy's feet.
Hellboy stood and lit a cigarillo. He inhaled the smoke, and sighed. "Dead to
rights." he said, spitting on the monster's corpse. His spittle contained a
highly combustible element and was enough to set the dead monster's body on
fire. Hellboy watched it burn. "I hate southern California." he muttered to
The Summers House...
Buffy Summers sat in her living room, looking at her friends. They were all
there. Her number one pal, Xander Harris. A tall, dark-haired, goofy-looking
young man. A longtime friend of hers and a very dedicated ally. Anya,
Xander's girlfriend and a former Vengeance Demon. Rupert Giles, a tall,
handsome older man from Britain. He was her Watcher. Willow Rosenberg, a
young redhead with a sweet smile, gentle manner, strong mind and even
stronger supernatural powers. Willow was a Witch. Her lover, the shy and
sweet Tara was a Witch as well. Then, there was Dawn Summers, Buffy's little
sister. Oh, and not to forget Spike.
Spike was a vampire. He was once one of Buffy's enemies. He became her ally
when he got a Behavior-modifying government-issue chip implanted inside his
head. Recently, he'd been given a Soul. He was a vampire with a Soul. One of
two in existence. There was another vampire with a Soul out there, his name
was Angel and he lived in Los Angeles. "Isn't this grand." Spike said.
"Oh, yeah." said Dawn, Buffy's kid sister, missing Spike's sarcastic tone.
"This party is totally cool."
Xander walked up to Buffy and gave her a present, a box wrapped in red paper.
"Happy birthday, Buffy." he said.
Buffy thanked him and unwrapped the present. It was a sweater. "It's nice,
Xand." she said. She gave him a hug.
"Aw !" said Willow. She looked at Tara, her girlfriend. "Isn't this sweet?"
Tara gave Willow a kiss on the cheek. "It is." The two young women smiled at
Xander went back to sitting on a couch where his girlfriend Anya waited.
"You never buy me such thoughtful gifts." she pouted.
Xander grinned. "Oh, c'mon, Anya. You know I love ya."
Anya looked away and Xander grinned before tickling her and she burst out
laughing and told him to stop. He pulled her into his arms and she kissed
him. "I love you, you big lug." she said.
Buffy sat, watching her friends. It's days like this that she was grateful
to have them. She felt a hand tap on her shoulder. It was Giles, handing her
a cup of tea. "Happy birthday, Buffy." he said.
Buffy looked up at the man who had been a parent figure, friend and ally to
her since she was a teenager. "Thanks."
Hellboy returned to the Mansion. The Mansion was rented by the Bureau as
their HQ while on Sunnydale...
He was tired and hungry. His clothes were torn. His friend Abraham Sapien
opened the door for him. "Oh, dear." said Abe. "Did you run into a shredder?"
Hellboy gave him his "don't-fuck-with-me" look and the amphibious man backed
Hellboy and company were in special assignment in Sunnydale... by orders of
"Where is Laura?" Hellboy asked.
Abe looked away, as did Dr. Manning, the Bureau official accompanying them on
the Special Assignment. "Not here." said Dr. Manning. "She went off on her
Laura was the newest addition to the Team.
Hellboy walked toward the door. He couldn't believe this. "You let her out
on her own, in a town full of demons?" he said, looking at Manning. "I'll
talk to you later, doc."
Hellboy walked out.
THE STREETS OF SUNNYDALE...
Laura Brett could not believe it. Finally out and free! She walked around,
soaking in the sights. She was a young girl of nineteen. Or had once been.
She stood five feet five inches tall, slender, with dark brown hair and pale
She was the result of a special government project. She had been diagnosed
with a terminal illness at sixteen. That's when Professor Michael Connard
came to her family with an idea. An experimental procedure. An experiment
in genetic engineering. She was given a drug which altered her genetic code
and triggered a recessive gene. Now, she was no longer one hundred percent
human. She could do things that were barely believable.
After the Experiment, a top secret organization killed Connard along with
her parents. They wanted to turn her into a weapon. She ran. She was found
by Professor Bruttenholm and he gave her a home. He showed her a world she
did not know existed. The world of the supernatural. She became part of the
Bureau and met Liz Sherman, Abe Sapien and of course, that fine-ass Hellboy.
She became the junior member of the Team. Lately, things had been hectic.
Liz Sherman had broken up with her boyfriend/ally Hellboy and ran off. An
encounter with a Psychic demon left her comatose. The doctors had no hope
of her recovering. This was a cruel blow to the team. But it also allowed
Laura Brett to become one of the Team. Like right now, she was in assignment.
Laura Brett was walking in the Sunnydale night when she heard a scream. She
pricked her ears for the sound and walked toward it. She was in a parking lot
near a school. Sunnydale high school. There was commotion. She approached and
saw that three guys and two girls had two skinny guys pressed against a wall.
The skinny guys were terrified and begging to be left alone.
Laura thought it was a hazing thing going on but at once sensed differently.
The three guys and two girls turned to look at her. At once, Laura knew they
were not human. Her suspicions were confirmed when their faces morphed into
horrid masks of evil. She had heard of such things. Vampires. The creatures
of the night. The drinkers of blood.
"Who the hell are you?" asked a tall black guy with fangs, obviously the lead
"Yeah, beat it, lady or we'll kick your ass!" echoed a skinny Latina vampire
Laura knew she was outnumbered but wouldn't give in. "Or you'll what, bite
me?" she teased.
The vampires threw the skinny guys away and Laura watched them hit the wall,
thrown by super strength. They got up and walked away quickly.
The vampires began to circle Laura Brett, and the girl watched them as they
did, awaiting the first attack...
Buffy Summers had hoped for a nice, quiet evening but she knew she had her
duty to perform. Patrolling. She went there with Xander, of all people. They
were walking and talking and for some reason ended up walking near the new
Sunnydale high school buildings when they heard a scream...
"Was that what I think it was?" Xander asked.
Buffy looked at him. "This is Sunnydale, do you have to ask?"
She sprinted toward the noise and Xander followed. They walked onto a not so
unusual scene, for them. Someone was being circled by vampires.
"Hey !" Buffy said.
The vampires turned to look at her. "The Slayer!"
Laura Brett had been readying herself for a hard fight when two people, a guy
and a girl barged in. The vampires were distracted. She ran toward one and
hit him as hard as she could. The vampire yelled in pain. Laura kicked him
and soon had him on the ground. 'How do you kill a vampire?' She asked
Around her, the vampires were fighting the newcomers. They practically
ignored Laura Brett. She watched the blond girl as she drove a sharp piece
of wood into a vampire's heart and the creature went poof! The guy who was
with the blond girl was not faring so well. He was being dragged down by two
vampires and one of them was getting ready to bite him. 'Oh, boy.' Laura
thought. 'Now I gotta play hero.'
She rushed to the trio and struck one of the vampires, a tall black female
in the back. The female vampire howled in pain and turned, grabbing Laura by
the throat. Laura grabbed the female vampire's arm and twisted with all of
her strength. The arm snapped off like a twig. Xander had been wrestling with
a Latina female vampire when he saw this strange girl snapping a vampire's
arm like a twig. Laura pushed the Latina off him and drew her arm back before
shoving it into the vampire's chest, ripping out the heart and looking in
wonder as the vampire turned into dust. "Ah-ha, I killed it!" Laura said.
She casually walked to the screaming black female vampire and ripped its
head off, again pausing in wonderment as the vamp exploded into dust before
walking toward Xander. She extended her hand. Xander hesitated, then took it.
"What's your name?" he asked.
The girl looked at him. "Laura." she said. She helped him up and pointed
toward Buffy. "Who's that?" she asked.
"My friend Buffy." Xander said proudly, watching as Buffy struggled with two
"Shouldn't you help her?" Laura said.
"Nah, Buffy can handle herself." Xander said confidently.
Buffy shoved a large vampire toward another and they stumbled. Just then, a
tall, bright red figure strolled into the scene. The vampires got back up
and were about to charge Buffy when two huge, red hands grabbed them by the
shoulders and threw them into the air. Buffy stook an instinctive step back
as what looked to be a tall, red-skinned man with horns approached her.
"What's all this?" he asked. Buffy drew into a battle stance.
Laura saw Hellboy come to the rescue. "Hellboy!" she said, and ran toward
him. She gave him a hug. Buffy and Xander looked at each other.
"Who are you people?" said the tall, red-skinned horned man in the black
"I'm the Slayer." said Buffy.
"Hellboy." The red-skinned demon said. Buffy cocked an eyebrow. "That's my
name." he said. He looked from her to Xander, then back. "What are you people
doing out here, fighting freaks?" he said.
"A Slayer's job." she said. She still looked at Hellboy with suspicion.
"We saved her life." Xander said, looking at Laura.
Laura stared at him. "No way, I could have handled this myself." she said,
looking back at Hellboy. "I ripped the head off one of those motherfuckers!"
she said enthusiastically.
Hellboy looked at Laura, then massaged his forehead. "Kids." he said.
Laura looked at him angrily and Buffy smiled. She knew how Hellboy, whoever
or whatever he was must be feeling. Her little sister Dawn frustrated her as
"We gotta go home." he said to Laura.
"I was just beginning to enjoy myself." Laura said. "You never let me go
Hellboy shrugged. "The Boss says you ain't ready, kid." He looked at Buffy
and Xander. "Thanks for stepping in."
Buffy was amused by the whole scene but not enough to let a young girl walk
off into the night with a tall demon. "Who are you and what are you doing in
Sunnydale?" she asked.
"Business." Hellboy said. "We gotta split." He turned around and saw that
Laura was gone, leaping off into the night and landing on a nearby building.
"Whoa." Xander said.
"Yeah, the girl is frustrated," Hellboy said. "There's always something." He
looked at them. "Adios." With that, he leapt back into the air.
"Wow," was all Xander could say.
"Wow's the word," Buffy said. "Let's see what Giles has to say on our new
Hellboy brought Laura Brett back to the Mansion. It was way past midnight
when they arrived.
"Where the bloody hell were you?" Dr. Manning asked.
"Chasing this hothead." said Hellboy, holding Laura Brett's arm.
"Let me go," she said.
He grunted and did.
She looked from him to Dr. Manning, then walked away. "This sucks." she said.
"And good night to you too, honey." Hellboy said.
Laura slammed the door of her bedroom.
"I took it the night went well," said Abe Sapien.
"Peachy, we met a girl with moves like Bruce Lee and some doofus she was
with." Hellboy said. "They sure could fight, though."
He sat down and told Dr. Manning about the vampires attack on the skinny guys
and later on Laura and how one girl and a geeky guy repelled them.
"I must find out who they were." said Dr. Manning. "I've got phone calls to
Hellboy went to his room and took a shower. He put on a robe and went to bed.
God, he missed NY.
Laura Brett stayed in her room. She remained there. She was not really mad at
Hellboy but she just did't like it that he was bossing her around or treating
her like a little kid. She had grown into a woman and apparently, he hadn't
noticed. He was too busy fighting monsters or doing his on-again, off-again
romance with that psycho babe Liz Sherman. Once, Laura had a thing for
Hellboy and a fierce hatred for Liz. Liz was a total psycho who didn't know
how to treat a man right. Laura knew how to treat a man right. She had done
it many times. She wanted Hellboy quite badly. Too bad he still saw her as a
kid sister... oh well, she'd show him someday soon.
THE SUMMERS HOUSE...
"Are you sure you saw this?" Giles said. He showed Buffy an ancient drawing
of a tall, man-like, red-skinned, horned demon with a tail.
"Yes." Buffy said.
Giles sat back on his chair, pensive.
"What kind of beast are we dealing with?" Buffy asked.
Giles looked at her. "This is not an ordinary demon, Buffy." he said. "This
is an Archdemon."
Xander laughed. "He lives under an arch? Gimme a break!"
Anya touched his shoulder. "Not now, honey." she said.
They were all gathered in the Summers living room. Spike. Tara. Willow. Dawn.
Xander. Anya. The whole gang.
"This breed of demon is not of this world." Giles said. "Archdemons are
manufactured by the Lords of Hell to be their henchmen."
Buffy grimaced. "He didn't look threatening," she said.
"He's a demon!" said Willow.
"How can he be killed?" she asked.
Giles looked at all of them and fell silent.
"What?" said Xander.
"You can't." Giles went on explaining. "This Hellboy as you called him is
an Archdemon, the archetype of Hell's perfect henchmen. A savage killer and
infiltrator." He shook his head. "These beings are by design fireproof. They
are exceptionally strong and fast and, in our universe, for all instance and
purposes, incapable of dying."
Buffy was tired of this. "How come?" she asked.
"Only an Archdemon's maker can unmake him."
The sun rose over the town of Sunnydale, California. Hellboy was fast asleep,
still. He was very tired after last night's activities. Battling an elder
demon and vampires was quite tiring. Hellboy felt strangely tired ever since
he came to Sunnydale. Usually, he was an inexhaustible fighting machine. He
felt like his strength and power were waning. How? He had so much difficulty
with the monster last night. Why? Usually, Hellboy was more than a match for
just about any type of demon. Now, an encounter with an elder demon seemed to
have sapped his strength. He just slept...
Laura Brett woke up around eight in the morning. She went to the bathroom,
brushed her teeth and did her business. Then, she stepped into the shower and
cleaned herself up. She wrapped a towel around herself and went to her room.
She put on a red T-shirt and black jeans. She "borrowed" forty bucks from Dr.
Manning's wallet and walked in front of the water-filled container in which
Abe Sapien slept. She went to town.
Sunnydale was a bright place, particularly lovely in that morning sun. Laura
went walking into something called the Magic Shop. There was a perky female
clerk behind the counter. "Hi, I'm Anya. Can I help you with something ?" she
"Nah, I'm just looking."
Laura walked around the store. She looked at some of the more interesting
items. She was very surprised when she felt a pair of eyes on her back. A
girl was looking at her. She smiled at Laura.
"I'm Tara," the girl said.
"Nice to meet ya. I'm Laura." Laura said. She shook the girl's hand and
thought that was the end of it. Tara held Laura's hand and looked at it.
"Oh, I'm sorry." she said. "You have beautiful hands."
Laura looked at Tara. Her gay-dar was on high alert. Dyke at twelve o'clock!
"Can I have them back?" Laura asked with a chilly smile. She had never cared
for dykes. As far as she was concerned, they were nasty and gross. Unnatural.
She walked out of the store, well aware that the lesbian girl was eyeballing
* * *
At the same time, in the depths of the Hellmouth, the ancient ones stirred
from slumber. They could sense that their champion had arrived. The one
created specifically to free them so that they might consume the world. It
was just a matter of time before he was found and brought to them.
To be continued...