Disclaimer: Dirty Sexy Money belongs to Berlanti Television and Touchstone
Television. This story is not-for-profit but I own it.

Date: 10/13/2008

Rating: NC-17

Warnings: Drug use, voyurism, male solo sex, male/female sex, female solo
sex, female/female sex, strong language, transgender

Categories: Het, slash, bi

Pairing: Patrick/Carmelita/f

Feedback: Yes, I want feedback.

Archive: Yes

Other Notes: This AU story is an answer to one of the Challenge Maker's
Prompt Challenges.

Summary: Tripp asks Nick to go over to Patrick's apartment to check on him
and discovers a plain brown package in the mailbox with photographs of
Patrick and Carmelita in hot and steamy poses with another woman.

Dedications: None so far.

Dirty Sexy Money: Something Really Stupid
by Andrew Troy Keller ([email protected])

My name is Nick George and ever since I had been hired as the personal
attorney of all of the members of the wealthy Darling family by a Mister
Patrick 'Tripp' Darling III and his wife Letitia, I had suddenly found that
my entire world has turned upside down with the fact that one or all of the
Darlings might had something to do with the murder of my own father and that
one of Tripp and Letitia's grown daughters whose name happens to be Karen was
the one who had surrendered her virginity to me some time ago.

But let me tell you right now that all of the forementioned was nothing
compared to what was about to happen to Tripp and Letitia's grown son Patrick
for you see, it was on a sunny Monday morning that I had recieved a phone
call from Tripp and he had asked me to go right over to Patrick's apartment
and check on him because his wife Ellen and his two children Margaux and
Robert were out of town and Letitia had called the apartment to see if he was
okay, only to have her hear the phone ringing and nothing else.

And of course, that had made me realize that since I had found myself growing
very fond of each and every member of one of the wealthiest families within
the entire Manhattan section of the City of New York, I had allowed myself to
go to Patrick's apartment complex just in time to take a little peek inside
his mailbox and discover that someone had just placed a plain brown package
with the rest of his mail.

And after I had started riding the elevator up to the floor that Patrick's
apartment happens to be on, I had opened the package and discovered that it
had contained some photographs that would really force Patrick to give up his
run for the Senate. That was before the elevator had stopped itself on
Patrick's floor and I had gotten myself out of the elevator, ouickly walked
myself over to his apartment door, knocked on it and yelled, "PATRICK, ARE

Then, after the apartment door had unlocked and opened itself right up and
allowed Patrick to look at me with a really depressed look on his face, let
out a sigh and said, "I was wondering when my parents would be able to talk
you into coming over here to check up on me, Nick. Well, since you're here,
you might as well come right on in." before he had moved himself out of the
way and allowed me to step into the apartment just in time for me to toss the
package that was filled with the photographs on the coffee table, take a deep
breath and ask, "Patrick, why do I have a feeling that you know what's inside
this package?"

"To tell you the truth, Nick. I could personally take a wild guess. It
contains something that might had came right out of Pandora's Box. Am I
right?", that was the question that Patrick had asked me before I had rolled
my eyes and answered, "You could definitely be right, Patrick. As a matter of
fact, if copies of these photos would ever become the front page story of
today's edition of the New York Post, this could turn into a public scandle
and your parents would be really unhappy about it."

And as soon as he had opened the package and gazed his eyes upon the pictures
of him having hot and steamy sex with his transsexual lover Carmelita and a
beautiful woman with dark-brown hair and brown eyes, Patrick had closed his
eyes, taken a deep breath and said, "Well, it looks like I have no choice but
to call WNBC Channel 4 and let them know that let both Matt Lauer and
Meredith Vieira know that I won't be on this morning's edition of The Today
Show after all."

"Are you sure that you don't want to chnage your mind, Patrick? I mean, I had
taken another look inside the package and noticed that there was no blackmail
note inside of it," that was what I had said to Patrick, only to have him
take a deep breath, turn his eyes toward me and say, "Look, Nick. I really
don't mean to sound nasty towards you and especially on a day like this. But
what you don't understand is that all it takes to ruin my chances to go to
the Senate are those pics and a simple whistling in the wind through the
rumor mill! And if that's not good enough for you, then you might as well go
ahead and excuse me for ever being born!Now, if Mister Mama's Boy would
excuse me, I need to go take a shower right now, okay?"

And with that, I had taken a deep breath, taken a couple of steps away from
Patrick and allowed him to step into the bathroom which was where he had
turned on the water, stripped off all of his clothes and stepped into the
shower, only to him place his forehead on wall, allow a single tear to run
down his cheek and thought to himself, *Why did I do that?I had allowed
myself to do something really stupid... and I'm going to lose the love of my
children because of it!*

And if you want to know why he was acting like that, I guess that I might as
well go ahead and tell you what he had told me right now. You see, it was
during his trial seperation from Ellen that Patrick had allowed himself to go
on a flat-out drinking binge after he had allowed himself to leave the
Russian Tea Room and right in the middle of the party that Tripp and Letitia
were throwing in order to celebrate their wedding anniversary.

And let me tell you right now that as soon as both my wife whose name happens
to be Lisa and I had left the party in order to go home and be with our
beloved daughter Kiki, poor Patrick had already placed himself inside the
Rainbow Room and ordered enough shots of brandy to keep him light-headed.

And if that was not bad enough, a certain transsexual bitch known as
Carmelita had walked herself over to where Patrick was sitting, placed her
hand on his shoulder and said, "So, Lover. Are you going to buy this sexy
lady a drink or what?" only to have a drunk Patrick turn his blurry eyes
toward that bitch, let out a small chuckle and say, "Well-well-well! If it
isn't the one bitch who had forced my wife to take our kids and walk out on
me! So, what the fucking hell do you want now, Bitch? You want to drain some
more of my blood?"

"Whoa! Take it easy, Patrick. That's not it at all. I just want to introduce
you to a really good friend of mine, that's all," that was the answer that
Carmelita had given to Patrick before she had allowed her beautiful friend
with dark-brown hair to walk on over, placed her hand on that friend's
shoulder and said, "Mister Patrick Darling, allow me to introduce to you Miss
Felicity Hatcher. She's also an actress like your sister Juliet, only she
wishes to star in porn films. And if I might be so bold as to say so, she
really does have a really hot body. Don't you agree, Patrick?"

And after he had looked with slushed eyes at Felicity and noticed that
Carmelita had told him the truth about her, the still-drunk Patrick had sat
himself back, looked at his transsexual lover dead in the eye and asked,
"What do you two babes have in mind?", and of course, after they had left the
Rainbow Room and gone back to his apartment, Carmelita had dragged Patrick
into the bedroom where they had stripped off all of their clothes and he had
began stroking his stiff cock right in front of her.

Then, after Carmelita had placed Patrick's drunk-on-his-ass naked body on the
bed and began sucking on his stone hard dick and rubbing her hands all over
his bare chest, Felicity had placed her bare-ass naked body and her tote bag
inside the room, taken a fully-loaded camera and tripod out of the bag and
set it up just right before she had also taken a portable radio out of the
tote and tuned it to WXRK-FM 92.3 K-Rock, the one radio station whose slogan
happens to be 'The Rock Of New York'.

And then, after she had activated the timer and allowed the camera to start
taking photos of the people in front of it, Felicity had placed herself next
to the camera and started pumping two of her fingers in and out of her hot,
wet pussy and carressing her own tits with the other hand before she had
moved herself closer and placed Patrick's stiff cock inside her asshole just
in time for Carmelita to start licking on Felicity's hot and steamy cunt and
carressing her firm breasts.

Then, after Felicity had placed her hands on Carmelita's bare shoulders and
said, "Aaaahhhh, yeeeessss! That's it! Do it, Carmelita! Touch me! Touch me
there! Suck my wet pussy dry while Patrick fucks me in the ass! Aaaahhhh!"
Carmelita had placed herself on the bed, allowed Felicity to start sucking on
her stone hard dick and kissed Patrick ever so deep and passionately on the

And after they had done that, Patrick had placed his stiff cock inside
Felicity's hot, moist snatch and his hands on her stiff mounds and she had
began sucking on Carmelita's dick and carressing her tits, Patrick's
sexually-charged transsexual lover had placed her hands on Felicity's bare
back and yelled at the top of her lungs, "AAAAHHHH, THAT'S IT! DO IT,

Then, after they had started moving themselves harder and faster and kept on
doing so until they had all came, collapsed due to exhaustion and fallen
asleep with their naked arms in a lover's embrace, the camera had stopped
taking the pictures and waited for both Carmelita and Felicity to get
themselves off the bed, reclaim the camera and sneak themselves out of the
apartment before Patrick wakes himself up with one nasty hangover.

As for what he was about to do in order to make sure that his run for the
Senate does not get deep-sixed by blackmail and scandle, the one poor member
of the Darling family had stepped out of the bathroom in only a robe, turned
his eyes toward me, cleared his throat and said, "Nick, I've changed my mind.
Call Matt and Meredith and let them know that I'll be there as soon as I get
myself ready. There's something that I need to let the voters know about me."



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