For those of you who don't know the English soap EastEnders, there's not
point in you continuing... However, if you do, you should be at least 18
years old and have a good sense of humour! Personally, I'm a bit peeved
that no-one else is doing parodies of our beloved soaps - God knows, I
hate 'em! :)

Set in the days well before our beloved Tiff had the sprog...

EastEnders: Part 1 - Tiffany And Ricky Get Washed (MF, voy)

Things were slow-going in The Vic - it was Tuesday afternoon and Tiffany knew
it had been a bad idea to stay open all day - maybe she could slip away and
go down the markets with Bianca later? If only Grant would bugger off and do
something in the cellars...

Tiffany was pretty much pissed-off with her job, since Grant hadn't taken
much notice of her lately - she hadn't planned on being without sex for this
length of time. She had decided that she must do something about that and
today was the day to do it! That morning she had put on what she called "My
fuck-me suit" - which consisted of a black one-piece short dress, with a
very low cut front. "Today," said Tiff to herself, "I'm gonna get me some

Just as Tiff was cleaning out the optics for the umpteenth time, Ricky
appeared at the bar, black grease striped down one side of his face after
working on the oil sump of another clapped-out motor at the Arches. "Hiya
Tiff, pint please love..."

"Cor, look at the state of you," said Tiff, smiling as she pulled Ricky's
pint, "You should get cleaned up before you come in 'ere looking like that."

"I would do Tiff, but Bianca's on an 'economy drive' - she reckons that we
could save at least 8 quid a week if we bath together... So I guess I'll 'ave
to wait won't I?" Ricky took his pint and sucked down the first quarter. "But
look at the state of you - You can't walk around like that! I'm sure Grant
won't mind if you clean your self up a bit, eh Grant?"

Grant eyed Tiffany with a glint of suspicion (nothing new there, she
thought!) "You'll be using the pub as a bloody B&B next..." he said, through
gritted teeth. Tiff took the comment as a 'yeah - alright then' and showed
Ricky through to the back...

"The showers not working, so you'll have to make do wi..." Ricky drowned out
the sound of Tiff's voice with a gush of hot water into the basin. "S'alright
Tiff, I'll make do!" Ricky stripped off his greased overalls and began to

Unbeknown to him, Tiffany had left the door open slightly, and was peeking
in. She watched as Ricky lathered himself, standing in front of the
full-length mirror - then she saw it... "My God!" thought Tiff, "Look at the
size of that!" Ricky had half turned so that Tiffany could see his massive
dick. "That must be at least 8 inches - and it's not even hard!" she thought
back to the amount of times Grant had tried to impress her with his 5 inches,
then stared at Ricky's manhood again. She began to feel a familiar tingle
between her legs and slipped a hand under her dress, pushing her finger
through her lips and began massaging her clit. "He's georgeous!" thought
Tiffany. As she rubbed faster, her head began to swim and she almost fell
against the door.

Her long legs began to wobble like jelly as she watched Ricky running a
flannel over his cock. Then she noticed something else - He was getting a
hard-on! She had been so busy watching his cock that she hadn't noticed him
gazing at her picture next to the mirror. "So... he does fancy me..." she

By now, Ricky was almost done washing, but this was too good for Tiffany to
miss - she took the moment... "Sorry Ricky, I just want to get the shower
curtains..." She pushed the door open wide as Ricky was stood, stark naked,
facing the door.

"Tiff! I err..." Ricky tried to cover up his cock with his hands, but
Tiffany could still see most of it, due to it's size. She didn't take her
eyes off it!

"Ooops!, sorry - I thought you'd be done by now..." Tiffany brushed passed
Ricky and stretched, "trying" to reach up and unclip the shower curtain. Her
dress rode up, showing to all the world what she had on under it - nothing!
Ricky gulped as he stared at her figure "Let me help you down with that"...

As Ricky moved forwards, Tiffany put her plan into action. She stepped back
as he came toward the bath and almost fell at his feet. "Whoops!" Ricky
grabbed her as she fell, holding her up by her armpits. His cock lay between
the cleft in her buttocks as she stumbled backwards.

"That was close..." Tiffany said, almost to herself.

Ricky picked her up and she slipped again - this time forwards, exposing her
rounded cheeks as she took him with her. Ricky lunged forwards to grab her
again, this time his semi- had grown to a full hard-on as he bent over her.
His dick slid between her legs as they flailed behind her. "Jesus, Tiff,
can't you keep still?" Ricky laughed as he stooped over her. It was now or
never, she thought...

"Ricky - fuck me!" It was almost an order! Ricky stopped in his tracks...

"Tiff? Are you sure?"

"Yes, Ricky, fuck me - now!"

He didn't need a second invitation - he had waited for years for this one
chance. "But what if Grant....?"

"He's in the cellar - the bar's closed - Do it!" Tiffany was aching for Ricky
to take her as she stooped over the bath, her legs spread and her arms
supporting her on the wall over the bath.

"If it's what you want..." Ricky dithered - as usial...

"Please Ricky, stick your cock in me!" Tiffany was getting desperate.

Ricky shuffled forwards, his huge erection wavering before him, as he clasped
onto Tiffany's shoulders, he slid his hands up her arms and, in one swift
motion, he he pulled her arms off the wall and rammed his cock into her
well-lubricated hole from behind. "Ooooohh!" shouted Tiffany - she had
thought that Ricky would like it rough - and he did!

As Ricky began to gather speed, his turid cock pounding at her arse,
Tiffany's dress began to fall, exposing her tits as they jiggled in time
with his thrusts. "Yeah, yeah, yeah, go on Ricky, fuck me!..." He pushed
Tiffany's head forwards, almost bending her double and grabbed onto her
hips, thrusting his cock even deeper into her glistening cunt.

* * *

"Bloody woman thinks she owns the place!" thought Grant, as he placed a tap
on the last barrell. "If I had my way, she wouldn't be allowed out of the
flat." His thoughts for Tiffany were less than complimentary as he made his
way up the steps out of the cellar.

* * *

Ricky's hand slipped around her buttocks as he continued his assault on her.
His cock flashed in and out as he sucked on his fingers. "Let's see if you
like this..." He slid his thumb up to her puckered arsehole and rubbed it
across the surface.

"Oh yeah!" Screamed Tiffany "Yeah, stick it in - please!"

She held on to the bath rim for support as Ricky inserted his thumb into her
arse, all the while his cock blasting away at the barmaids cunt. Tiffany's
head was spinning yet again - she knew that Ricky would be a good fuck - but
hell! Not this good. She slid her hand up to her clit as he rammed into her
again and began to squeeze it in rhythm with his strokes.

* * *

"Maybe I'm doing something wrong?" Grant asked himself as he crossed the bar,
on the way up to the flat above. "She did get dolled-up today - I wonder if
she's up for a bit?" The thought of her naked body was the only reason Grant
had kept her on at The Vic - and she knew it. He idly rubbed his cock through
his jeans as he got to the bottom of the stairs "..and maybe I'll give her
what she wants..."

* * *

Ricky swung Tiffany round so that she faced the frosted window, overlooking
The Square and began humping forwards. "Ungh, ungh, ungh, ungh...!" Tiffany
began to edge fowards, nearing the window pane, until she was pressed up
against it. "Ricky?.... Ungh! ungh!..." She was lost in an orgasm again...
Her body slid up and down the window pane as Ricky continued to pump at her
rump and she used her hands to steady herself against the onslaught.

* * *

Just across from The Vic, Ian Beale smiles as he glances across the gardens
his father had planted. Just within his view was the bathroom window of the
Queen Vic, with a pair of tits Ian had never seen the like of, bobbing up and
down against it and a face pressed against the pane. "Grant and Tiff must
have made up again!" he thought to himself.

* * *

Tiffany realised that there was a chance that someone might have been able to
see them, as she moved her hands to the edge of the frame and gave a shove
backwards, against Ricky's cock. Ricky was taken unawares and toppled
backwards, catching the door to the bathroom and slamming it shut. Grant
rounded the corner as Ricky's spunk welled up in his balls. "Tiff?? Is that
you Tiff?" called Grant.

Ricky surpressed the urge to scream as his boiling spunk gushed into Tiffany.

"Yeah....Grant....I'll be out... in a min...ute!" stuttered Tiffany, as she
exploded into another orgasm.

"Where's Ricky at?" Grant asked.

"He left ages ago!" she shouted as Ricky withdrew his still spurting cock
from her orifice with a 'plop'.

"I'll be in the bedroom..." he said, as he saundered passed the bathroom
door. Tiffany stood straight as Ricky's spunk spurted up her back and
dribbled down her inner thighs...

"Ricky, that was fucking excelllent..." She put her arms around his neck and
slipped her tongue down his throat. Ricky groped at her buttocks, grinding
his spunk-covered flaccid cock into her mound and said that he should get
back to work. Tiffany agreed and then realised the only way out is through
the bathroom window...


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