Simpsons: Springfield Taboo Part 3 - The Plan (m-solo,exhib)
Milhouse was blank-faced and pale, his blood draining from his brain to his crotch as he heard Bart speak.
"So yeah...I'm on a mission from God," concluded Bart, beaming as he recanted his trip.
Dumbfounded, Milhouse pushed up his glasses so he could clearly see his friend. "G...God? You spoke to...God?"
A chuffed Bart retorted "Yep! Or...well, some Mother spirit or something, it was warm, maternal." Biting his lip, Bart further pondered the experience, a growth forming in his pants.
"So...are you gonna', you know... Tell your Mom?"
Bart's eyes dropped, his expression dimmed, how could he ever explain this to his Mom? Would she ever go for it?
"Maybe, if she ate some mushrooms too?" stated Milhouse.
As Bart's face lit up he shook his friend with excitement, "Milhouse! You're a genius! That's it! I just have to get her to eat them too. Then she'll understand why we NEED to be together!" Bart started packing up the pile of porno tapes, "Milhouse, grab a container from the kitchen, we're gonna take the lot!"
Milhouses nodded and retreived a 3-litre Tupperwear container, "Will this suffice?" quizzing Bart.
"Perfect, we better get going, my mom's gonna be home in an hour and she thinks I'm in my bed, sick."
Milhouse was already out the door, desperate to see if his Mom would try some shrooms too, a fire kindling inside him. His barely-pubescent wang protruding from his shorts. Reaching into his underpants, Milhosue began to rub himself as he walked down the street, wary of those who might see him masturbating in public. The thought of getting caught aroused him even more, almost as much as his mother's naked body printed in his mind. "Arrrrrggggghhhhhnnnnggggg!!!" Milhouse groaned as the patter of footsteps emerged from behind him.
"Jeez Mil, save it for your Mom!" cackled Bart as he dashed past his friend.
Immediately retrieving his hand, Milhouse cursed, "FUCK Bart! Don't scare me like that!"
Bart responded with a challenge, "Last one there's a virgin for life!" grinning maniacally.
Keen to prove his libido, Milhouse sprinted down the street, the boys headed once again to Frink's House.
* * *
The sky was overcast when they arrived at the Professor's residence, the familiar sense of excitement and danger ever-present in the air. Milhouse handed the Tupperwear container to Bart and took his scout post by Frink's letterbox. Hopping the 5ft fence like it was nothing, Bart proceeded straight to the shed.
Upon entering the backyard, Bart was stopped at the sight of the shed's door, unlocked and slightly ajar, an artificial blue light emanated from inside. Bart treaded slowly toward the shed, his eyes locked on the light inside, as he approached closer, the light dimmed, and four blue, plastic fingers emerged from inside. Bart froze...
"STOP! Glyvin TRESS-passer! Back for more LOOTING! Eyven Glyvin..."
Bart was paralysed with fear, as Frink's index finger pointed to the plastic container the boy was clutching.
"Is THAT your plan? To steal the rest of my Sacred Shrooms!? GLYVIN I'm getting a Migraine!" Frink palmed his temple and yapped sporadically. "Ugghhhh, well I sup-POSE there's no harm in showing you my WORK since you've already SEEN it!" Pinning the shed door open and motioning for Bart to enter. "Well? C'mon I'm on a schedule here."
Still stunned, Bart followed the Doctor into the shed, wondering what secrets might be uncovered this time. Peering inside, a large, makeshift-looking microscope sat on the wooden shelf, aside a flask filled with a strange gelatinous substance. The tall display case was now shut, and padlocked.
"I've extracted a sample of her endometrium to synthesise a symbiotic compound that will HOPE-fully foster the necessary conditions for artificial insemi-NATION!"
Bart stared blankly, "Uhhh, endo-what now?"
The Professor refutedly shook his head "TURKEY-BASTING you imbecile! Artificial insemination."
A dark curiousity crept through Bart's mind, "Sooo who are you inseminating?" queried Bart, tantalised by the expected answer...it came...
"Glyvin if you MUST know, the samples belong to one Mrs. Neidelbaum, who is by all biological accounts my MOTHER-Eyven-Glyvin-Ein!" Frink examined the gelatinous goo before directing his gaze at Bart. "Although I'm sure you already KNEW that."
The professor scoffed and turned back to the flask of goo, holding it beneath his nostrils and taking a powerful whiff, "Mmmhhhnnnggg cranberries, home-made pie."
The Professor was entranced by the smell of the goo, what was it exactly? Bart reached to inspect the display case when Frink snatched his hand away, barking "PRIVATE-eyven! It's locked for a reason!"
Bart gave the professor a discerning look "What's in there?" he asked Frinks blatantly, who had returned to his microscope.
"Nothing it's...just an old project, it was a FAIL-ure, I think I've got it though, I just need to isolate a few more strands and we'll have a successful compound. I suppose you're wondering what this is all about? Well, you've already eaten the mushrooms so you've met the creator. You HAVE taken the mushrooms I presume?"
Bart gave an astute nod, reflected by Frink's awkward giggling. "Haa! So she told you of the sacred tradition and how WE must spread this message through the world?" Bart gave a smirk before nodding again. "Well? Have you copulated?" The professor asked with furrowed eyebrows.
"Not yet, I was gonna' give her some mushrooms, that's why I'm here."
Frink reached for his coat-pocket and withdrew a unique gold key which he then used to unlock the display case. He opened the doors, presenting the array of glass jars and the one large jar, fetus still inside. "As you can see we've had some issues procreating, it seems her uterus is INHOSPITABLE! So I've been developing a formula to protect her eggs from the 'harsh environment."
Motioning sarcastically with his fingers, Frink handed a Perspex tub full of shrooms to Bart. "Now make sure you only give her a couple, if she has too many she'll SQUIRT and you'll have one hell of a mess to clean up. Now get out of here, I've got synthesising to do!"
Bart remarked "Yes sir!" as he stepped through the yard, out to the front gate.
Milhouse was still there, arms crossed and tapping his foot. "Finally! Did you get them?"
Bart handed the Tupperwear container to his friend before splitting up the psychedelics between them, "Meet me at school tomorrow, to debrief."
Milhouse nodded, keen to try them out for himself. The boys parted ways and Bart headed back home, thoughts racing, he was hell-bent and heaven sent. He would bed his mother tonight, there was no other option.
End - Part 3