DISCLAIMER: Many of the characters in here are property of Disney, Warner
Bros. and other animation-type studios. The Roger Rabbit franchise
specifically belongs to Touchstone Pictures while the characters were created
by Gary K. Wolf. I'm just using the characters in an incredibly perverted way
and don't intend to do any of that copyright infringement stuff. I'm just a
poor, filthy-minded bastard who really can't afford to be sued!

FEATURING: Ariel, Alice, April O'Neill (TMNT), Lois Lane (Superman: TAS)

RATING/PAIRING: NC 17, MF, toon, oral, anal

FEEDBACK: Appreciated. In fact, if anyone has any suggestions for future
stories then I'd be more than happy to consider them - it saves me thinking
about what I want to do to these characters...

Who Framed Roger Rabbit: Intern In Toon Town Part 5 - Into The Rabbit Hole
by ValleyBoy69 ([email protected])

I didn't sleep well that night. I kept getting plagued with thoughts about
what I'd seen Betty Boop and Baby Herman being forced to do in the back of
the Ink & Paint Club. Should I have intervened? Tried to stop it? Would that
just have led to an even bigger beating than I'd gotten anyway? And if I had
got the crap kicked out of me then, I wouldn't have found out about Batgirl
and Ivy's mysterious connection to the men in suits. So it was okay that I
did nothing, right? But why had I been so turned on by the scene? Christ,
what was wrong with me?

Thankfully none of my tossing and turning disturbed Ariel who seemed to sleep
soundly all night, my arm wrapped around her tiny Toon body. How could she do
that just after her husband had been killed? Was the innocence just an act?
Did she sleep with me just to get me on her side?

All these questions and I didn't have an answer to any one of them.

The sun crept through the curtains around six in the morning. I wanted
nothing more than to just stay in bed and try to get some sleep. But Ariel
was a morning Toon. She turned around, rubbing her eyes then seeming
instantly awake. Another Toon thing. They can just jump out of bed and burst
into song while ordinary humans need time to get their gears whirring.

"Morning," she smiled, her large eyes sparkling brightly. As she sat up, the
sheets fell down around her waist, revealing her pert breasts. Oh God, just
looking at her was stirring up a reaction but I could barely keep my eyes
open. She groped around under the sheets until she found what she was looking
for. "I think I can wake you up."

Her whole body disappeared from view. I gasped as I felt her tongue begin to
tentatively lick around the tip of my cock, bringing it to full attention.

I lifted up the sheets to gaze down at her mass of red hair - completely
perfect with no sign that she'd spent the last few hours asleep - bobbing up
and down on my length. She stopped suddenly. "No peeking," she whispered. I
dropped the sheets and she went back to work.

The feel of my cock in her Toon mouth was driving my wild. It shook off the
cobwebs in my head better than any cup of coffee. It wasn't long before I
felt that familiar build up, followed by blissful release as I came into
Ariel's mouth.

She emerged from down below, a small trail of my cum dribbling from the side
of her mouth. I reached forward and wiped it away. The moment I did, she
grabbed my finger and licked it off. "Mustn't let it go to waste," she

* * *

An hour later, over a breakfast that wasn't very filling (much like Toon
beer whose effects you can just shake off, the food isn't so nutritious for
humans... or Toons for that matter - why do you think Shaggy and Scooby Doo
have to pile up such huge sandwiches? It's what it takes to fill them), I
told Ariel that I would do all that I could to find out what I could to prove
her innocence. First, I had to track down Batgirl and Ivy who I knew wouldn't
be easy to find, especially after my run-in at the club the night before.

With that in mind, I left her mansion (through the back entrance) just after
seven, promising to tell her anything that I'd found. I was a little unsure
on that front, not being one hundred percent confident that she wasn't
somehow connected to Eric's demise.

Once I was far enough away from the more upmarket Toon homes, I looked for
a payphone to call a cab to the Studio. Despite my newfound calling as a
detective, I still had a job to do.

Within a few minutes I found a toucan with a multi-coloured beak perched on
a small, waist high post. He had a box around his neck marked - in rough,
childlike handwriting - 25c. I popped a quarter into the box. "Who'd ya wanna
call?" the toucan asked in a screechy voice.

"Need to get a cab. I'll trust your judgement," I said, rubbing my head. The
pain from the fight (if you could call it that) the night before was still
not subsiding.

The toucan opened his mouth and the sound of ringing emerged from deep within
his bowels. A few moments later a rough Brooklyn accent could be heard. "B's
Cabs. What kin I do fer ya?"

I moved a little closer to the toucan's mouth, feeling more than a little
awkward standing there, shouting into a Toon bird's beak. "Uh... Could I get
a cab from..." I looked around for a street sign. "The corner of Pluto and
Flintstone to MDW Studios."

"No problem. Be about ten minutes."

The bird closed its beak and I moved away so other people could make calls.
Out of the corner of my aching and no doubt bruised eye, I noticed someone on
the opposite side of the road. A Toon, for sure and most likely a female one,
although you never can tell, especially given people like Bugs Bunny's
proclivity for cross-dressing. Some Toons actually manage to do a decent job
of it.

She had a long overcoat that didn't quite cover a pair of small black shoes
and white cotton stockings. She carried a large yellow umbrella that covered
her face, but I could make out she was petite, and wisps of blond hair could
be distinguished around her shoulders. She seemed to be looking in my
direction but as soon as I focused on her, her stance shifted as she glanced
another way.

This charade continued for another few minutes until I finally gave in and
started to make my way across the road. Something was suspicious here. This
was confirmed by the mysterious Toon's attempt to make a run for it. She
began to make her way up the street as nonchalantly as possible. As I got
closer, she started to speed up to a brisk stroll.

She crossed another road and through a gate into the Marvin Acme Memorial
Park, a tribute to Toon Town's late, lamented owner and caretaker. I
followed, forgetting the cab and my need to be at the studio before Maroon
bit my head off.

I saw the yellow umbrella disappear into the small area of trees that
surrounded the main park and started to run, shoving branches out of my face
until I came to a grove in the centre of what appeared to have become a
forest before my very eyes.

The figure ahead of me had stopped and was looking around nervously. I
started for her. "Hey! What are you doing watching me like that? Who are

She turned around, revealing herself. Short, long blonde hair, large blue
eyes. The picture of innocence. Alice. She of Wonderland fame. Although she
appeared to be a girl in her mid-teens at best, she'd been drawn in 1949 for
her movie debut two years later.

"I just needed to get you away from any crowds," she said, closing the
umbrella and propping it against a tree. The rain coat was off next to reveal
her blue dress and white apron. She came closer to me, still looking around
from time to time as if she was convinced someone was out to get here.

"What's this about exactly?" I asked, my curiosity piqued by her actions.
"Eric, right?"

Alice nodded. "The Princesses are behind it, I know they are."

"You've got proof?"

"They've been acting strangely ever since it happened." She glanced around
again. "I think they conspired to do away with him. I don't know who did the
deed but I know Ariel asked Belle to do it."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. "Ariel? Are you sure? Absolutely

"She said, 'I need you to get rid of him,'" Alice said, completely sure.
"This was the day before it happened!" Another peek over her shoulder.
"Belle went straight to Jasmine and told her they had to do something...
I'm not sure what happened after that..."

My legs felt like jelly. I staggered backwards. A tree behind me caught my
fall and kept me upright. "How could I have been so stupid?" I wondered out

Alice came up to me, her hands on my chest. She looked up into my eyes. "It's
not your fault. She does this all the time."

"Conspire to have someone murdered?" I asked incredulously.

"No," the young blonde Toon shook her head. "Use men like she used you."

"How did you...?"

"I saw you leave her house this morning."

"You saw me... What were you doing there?"

Alice's hands reached around my chest, as she pulled herself closer to me.
Her hair smelt of roses. I could feel her breathing against me. "Ever since
the news broke... I didn't want to go to the police - yours or ours - because
who'd believe me? I had no evidence! But if I could catch one of them out.
Get something..." She look up at me ponderously. "You believe me, right?"

"I don't know..." I began. "I... I guess..." What could I say? I'd never
known a Toon to lie before. Although, if what Alice was telling me was true,
that's exactly what Ariel had been doing.

"Will you help me?" Alice asked pleadingly. "Help me find something on them?"

"I'll do whatever I can. Whoever did this, I want to find them..."

"Thank you!" Alice grabbed my cheeks and pulled me into a kiss, her tongue
darting into my mouth. Tasted like roses too. I could feel myself getting
harder. So could Alice, her body so close to mine as it was.

Maybe it was my sudden doubt about Ariel, a sense of betrayal, but I
responded to Alice's kiss. My arms wrapped around her slim body, a hand
reaching down to her ass. I gave it a squeeze. She moaned into my mouth.

"Eat me," she whispered.

I start to move down her body, kissing her neck, running my hands over her
breasts that were a lot bigger than her dress made them appear to be. I
lingered there for a moment, enjoying the feel of her tits that were clearly
unladened by a bra and enjoying the buoyancy of Toon physics.

On my knees, I lifted up her dress. The white stockings went up to her
thighs. I kissed the bare flesh between where they ended and her white cotton
panties began. What was I doing? I couldn't believe I was just letting myself
go like this. Was I really that angry at Ariel? Damn right, I was. I clawed
at Alice's panties, pulling them down to her ankles and revealing a tiny
patch of yellow hair right above her slit, already wet with excitement.

I buried my face in her pussy, lapping up the sweet juices, and then parting
her lips just a little. Alice groaned loudly as I found her clit and began
tonguing it with growing intensity. Alice thrust her groin at me, forcing my
tongue deeper into her hole as I sucked carefully on her clit. "That's
right... Just like that... Oh please... Just a little more..." Suddenly, I
felt her whole body stiffen. She grabbed the back of my head and pulled me
in even closer. "Aaaaah... Yes, that's it." She relaxed her grip on me and
stumbled backwards, almost tripping herself up on the panties that were still
tying her feet together.

I moved forward, took her in my arms and helped her down onto the ground.
"That was magnificent," she beamed. She leaned forward and kissed me, tasting
her own juices.

Alice kicked her panties from off her feet and reached down to my crotch,
feeling my already engorged cock. "Let's do something for both of us now,"
she whispered.

I didn't need telling twice. I unzipped my pants, throwing them onto the
grass a few yards away. As I stripped off my shirt, Alice was pulling her
own dress off over her head, until she was lying before me in just her
stockings and shoes, and the bow in her hair.

I began to guide my cock into the wetness between her legs, gasping at her
tightness. My thrusts were slow at first, getting accustomed to her size as
she was to mine. Then, as each slide into Alice became easier... as the silky
wetness of her Toon pussy increased... I began to fuck her harder, plunging
deep into her. "Oh! Yes! Yes!" she groaned into my ear. "Just like that...
Keep doing that."

So I did. I kept doing that. I'd pushed myself up with my arms, my lower body
gyrating as I fucked her closer and deeper. Just as she was getting used to
that, I began to pull out all the way, then propelling myself right back into
her as hard as I could. Her eyes nearly bulged the first time then, as I
continued, her legs wrapped around me, her body begging for more.

On one pullout, I was so slick with her juices, my thrust back in missed the
spot! She whimpered as my cock entered her ass. I was about to apologise when
I noticed a sparkle in her eye. "Keep going," she moaned. So I did. I pushed
my cock into her asshole, slowly filling her up until I got as deep as I

Just like before, my thrusts began slowly, a little unsteadily, but quickly
build up to a crescendo of intense, passionate, sweaty lovemaking. The
tightness was too much. Alice's arms were around my neck, her legs around my
waist and my cock was deep in her ass. I couldn't hold on any longer. I felt
myself come, my seed squirting up into her back passage.

Breathing heavily, I slowly withdrew. As my cock popped out, a small dribble
of cum emerged from Alice. She was as exhausted as I was. As I lay on the
grass next to her, I sighed. "My God," I gasped. "I can't believe I did

"You don't regret it, do you?" Alice asked.

Maybe I took a little too long in responding but she suddenly got defensive.

"Look, as long as you're going to help me out..." she said huffily as she
grabbed her dress in one hand and her panties in the other.

I reached forward and touched her arm. "It's not that," I said quietly. "It's
just... What you've told me has challenged everything I thought I knew about
these last few days. Maybe confirmed a few suspicions, I don't know. It's
just a lot to take in... That on top of what we just did... Which was good.
Great, even! Amazing!"

Alice smiled and blushed a little. Being a Toon her cheeks turned a very
visible pink. "So, you're going to find proof for me?"

"Whoever did it, that's what I was going to do," I nodded. Alice was starting
to get dressed. I took it as an opportunity to do the same thing. "I guess
the detective or the police should really be doing it but the studio doesn't
want cops involved and I wouldn't trust that PI as far as I could throw him."
Although, I noted to myself, if Alice was right, Mitch Mitchelson's intense
questioning of Ariel may have been valid.

Alice pulled on the raincoat and pushed up the umbrella. "We can't be seen
leaving together," she said. "I'll go this way, you go the way you came. I'll
send you a message if I find anything. We can meet here again."

"Works for me," I said as she disappeared into the trees. I headed back
towards the entrance of the park. Within a few minutes the undergrowth gave
way to a stone path around playing fields where several Toons were throwing
balls around, walking their dogs or, in the case of one in particular was a
dog walking his... Well, it had four legs and long ears but it also had a
distinctive human face! It made me feel a little better about Pluto's lot in
life knowing that human-type Toons were being kept as pets by their doggie
masters, too.

* * *

When I got to the studio, Maroon's secretary told me to go straight into
his office. I was expecting to get hell for turning up so late because of my
encounter with Alice but was surprised when the only person in the room
seemed happy to see me.

Problem was, it wasn't Maroon. It was Mitchelson. He sat in my boss's chair,
his feet up on the desk, blowing smoke rings from one of Maroon's cigars that
he'd procured from the box next to all the paperwork.

"You..." I began. "Where's Maroon?"

Mitchelson smirked. "The board of directors called them up to their suite at
the last minute. Some kind of fuss. I dunno. Don't care either, so long as
I'm getting paid." He looked me up and down. "Where'd you get that shiner?"
he asked. "Been pissing off the wrong Toons?"

The wrong humans, actually, I thought but went for a lie instead. "Slipped
coming out of the shower. Got my face on the sink." The look on his face said
he didn't believe me. "So we're working together again today?" I tried to
hide my disgust at the thought of another day with the thin-lipped man and
his odd-smelling car.

"Don't know. I hear you've been doing a bit of investigating on your own. At
the Ink & Paint Club."

I stepped back. How did he know? Was he following me too? Was I a suspect
after all? "Yeah, I went there. Heard there was a band I liked playing. Turns
out I got the day wrong."

"Mm-hm," Mitchelson said. His eyes narrowed.

I needed to distract him from me. If I got taken away for questioning it
would ruin the line of investigation I was taking on my own. "I may have an
interesting lead." Mitchelson perked up suddenly. I continued: "You might've
been onto a conspiracy involving the Princesses. I heard from a source who
wants to stay anonymous that..."

"Source? You mean that little blonde Toon that fucks rabbits?"

I was taken aback for the second time. It seemed almost certain that he had
been following me ever since we went our separate ways the day before. "I'm
afraid I can't divulge..."

"Don't worry," Mitchelson grinned, clearly realising he had one over on me.
"We already knew about that. She's been to all the cops telling them her
story. And that's what it is. She's full stories too. Always about the
Princesses." A flicked the ash from the cigar onto some of Maroon's
paperwork. He didn't give it a second look as he continued: "She's been
trying to get them arrested or humiliated for decades. Wants to be one of
them, y'see. She's been around for longer than the mermaid, the Indian broad
and the monster-fucker and thinks she deserves to be part of their little
group." Another smoke ring emerged from his mouth. "Doesn't seem to realise
it takes being, y'know, a princess to get in."

Oh, crap. So was I just part of some ploy to fuck over Ariel, Jasmine and
Belle because they wouldn't let her join their club? I felt sick.

"She's completely nuts," Mitchelson continued. "Been that way for years.
Constantly trying to get noticed. Going to clubs without panties on in the
hopes cameras'll be around, getting drunk at premieres... I hear there's
even a movie out there with her fucking those two rabbits from her movie.
And the guy with the hat. Taking it from all three angles. And you can just
see she's done it a million times before. So I heard, anyway."

I doubted he'd just heard it.

Before either of us got to say anything else, Maroon entered his office. He
looked terrible. Worse than the day after the murder. He didn't even scowl
at Mitchelson for being in his chair, much less let forth a torrent of abuse.
I knew that's what anyone else would've normally got.

"Tim, take the day off," he said, turning to me. "Nothing much going on here
today. Got the press all over the place - Toon and human - and I don't want
anyone saying a damn thing to them. I'm sending home everyone who doesn't
need to be here. Fully paid, of course. Don't want them turning against the
studio and doing exactly what we're trying to prevent - stories leaking!"

I didn't want to point out that I wasn't getting paid anyway. I was too
grateful to have the opportunity to get out and doing my own investigating.
Still, whatever got Maroon as shocked as he was didn't bode well for me.

"Well? You've got the day off! Get home! Do what it is you do!"

I nodded quickly and made for the door. Just as I was leaving I got a snippet
of conversation between Maroon and Mitchelson: "They told you about the lab
down at Gardena, right? That you have to go there and ask around?"

"Yeah, I got it," Mitchelson replied. "Ask around there about the... green

They both turned at looked at me. The door was still slightly ajar and they
must've figured I was right behind it.

"Go home, Tim!" Maroon bellowed. At least for that moment he was back to his
old self.

* * *

I was going, but home definitely wasn't my final destination. As I headed out
of the studio my head was abuzz with questions. What was that about a lab in
Gardena? And "green fellas"? What did Mitchelson mean by that? Clearly he
meant Toons. Who else would be green? But what kinds of Toons? Aliens? Frogs?
Holy shit!


It came to me like that. I had no idea why I was so certain that it had to be
the Ninja Turtles but it made a strange kind of sense.

I reached into my jacket pocket where I'd been keeping the typewritten sheet
I'd taken from the Million Toon March offices the day before. Thankfully it
hadn't been stolen by the suited thugs who'd grabbed my phone. And there it
was. Right in the middle of the list of instructions to important members of
the protest committee. The gist of it was, "Stay doing exactly what you've
been doing, and if anyone threatens you, get in touch with the Turtles at
this number..."

I ran to a payphone outside the studio - a real one now that I was on the
human side of the Toon Town Tunnel - threw in a few quarters and tapped in
the number. It started to ring, then kept ringing... and ringing... and
ringing... I was about to give up when a female voice appeared on the other


"Is... Raphael there?" I quickly went for the first name that came to mind.
Better to be specific than general. More likely to get somewhere.

A nervous pause. "I'm afraid he's not here. Who is this?"

"It's... Phil. From down in Gardena. Need to speak to him. He didn't turn up
for work today..." Oh God, I hoped to high heaven that they actually worked
in this place and I wasn't clutching at straws.

A heavy sigh emerged on the other end of the line. "Okay. You've got me. If
you can send someone over, I can tell you all I know..."

What? This was working? How did that happen? "We... uh... don't seem to have
your address down here anyway. Damn secretaries. Could you give it to me?"

The woman on the other end reeled off a street name and number. I thanked
her, promised to send someone over and hung up.

My legs nearly gave way under me. It worked! It actually worked! I was
feeling the kind of rush that I imagined all detectives got when they managed
to get another lead. It almost made up for being used by Alice for whatever
crazy scheme she had in mind to discredit Ariel and the other Princesses. And
it almost made me forget how suspicious Maroon was acting back in his office.

Wishing that I owned a car, something I was beginning to realise was
absolutely essential in LA, I called another cab and gave the driver the

* * *

I pulled up next to an custard pie store in the part of Los Angeles that had
been known as Little Toon Town since the first group of Toons emerged from
their own little enclave to fit in amongst the humans back in the mid-'50s.
Just like all other minorities, they suffered during those first few years,
with those who felt they should stay amongst their own kind. By the 1960s,
things had settled and the Toons of the LTT, or Leet as it became known in
the '80s, were just as important a part of the local culture as the Asian
and Hispanic populations.

Quite a few Toons here worked in the human world, at cafes, bars and offices,
while others used it as an easy commute to the Studio. For those humans who
were too nervous to go into Toon Town proper, the Leet offered a little of
the unexpected amidst the comfort of the human world.

The address I was given was an apartment above the store. I paid the driver
and pressed the buzzer at the entrance. A few moments later the click of the
door unlocking indicated I could go in.

At the top of a narrow staircase was another door where a female humanoid
Toon was waiting for me. I recognised her instantly and really shouldn't have
been surprised at her presence. April O'Neill stood before me in her familiar
yellow jumpsuit, the front zipped down just low enough to give anyone who
wanted to look a brief glimpse of her cleavage. Her brown hair was cut to
just above her shoulders. She didn't look any different to how she was back
during the glory days of her acting career in the late '80s, early '90s Ninja
Turtles cartoon.

"You're Phil?" she asked cautiously. "You seem young to be working in

"I'm an intern." At least that part was true, but I figured I ought to
carry on with the story I'd built up, at least for now. "So what's going on?
Raphael didn't turn up for work at the lab today. We were worried." I rolled
my eyes dramatically. "Well, the boss was more furious... But you know what
bosses are like."

She nodded knowingly. "Come in."

April led me through into the apartment. It looked as though it had gone
through a pretty hasty cleaning session but under the surface it was a mess.
A few pizza boxes poked out from under the sofa, a stain from a spilt can of
soda covered the back of one armchair. In fact, all the seats except for one
looked pretty well-worn.

I guess my impression of the place was instantly readable on my face. April
shrugged. "I try my best but ever since they stopped getting acting work
they've become such..."

"Bums," I said a little too quickly.

The look in April's eyes said I wasn't far wrong. She pointed at the dented
sofa. "That's where their shells have been. Just sitting up there playing
video games and eating pizza. Like they're still on TV. Just without the
saving the city from crime." She sat down carefully. "Which is why I told
them to try and get security work. Even if they've never done it before,
most people are dumb enough to think that if they fought evil on TV that
they're qualified."

She indicated for me to sit down on a chair opposite her, then continued: "I
suppose you want to know where they are?" I nodded. She sighed. "The truth
is, I don't know. After that guy... Prince Eric... got killed they started
acting really strange." She shook her head. "It's probably nothing. I bet
everyone involved in those protests felt like it was their fault. I know I
did. Did you know they were actually offered the chance to go back and work
on the new show, but as soon as they found out that a new, younger-looking
April was being drawn for it and I wasn't wanted anymore, they walked off the

"I'd heard something like that."

"I shouldn't be so mad at them really. They did it for me. But as soon as
they refused to work on it the studio pretty much blacklisted them. It costs
so much to get a new Toon drawn... and the guys refusing to work unless I
worked meant the studio had to pay out for four!" She shook her head. "That's
when they started working for you guys at the lab. I'm sure Don has told
everyone there about it. He's so sensitive. It hit him really hard. Raph
doesn't stop swearing about it. Mike's been pretty philosophical about the
whole thing, of course. Then there's Leo... he's been looking for a way to
get us other shot. He was the one who got the studio to relent and let us
record the commentaries for the DVDs that came out last year. He found the
security job at Artistic Chemicals, too..." She laughed to herself. "But you
know this. That's not why you're here."

She got up again, clearly not comfortable in the messed up sofa. I realised
she'd directed me to the only decent chair. It was most likely her own. "Can
I get you a coffee?" she asked. I nodded politely. "I'm pretty good at it. I
got a job in an espresso place here in the Leet once the old show ended. The
guys still managed to get promotional work for a few years after, but not me.
But what can you do, right?"

April headed into the kitchen and I followed. "So you've got no idea where
they are?" I asked. "The boss isn't going to be too pleased. There's things
that need... securing."

April turned back to me and smiled. "You can cut out the act, you know. I
figured you work for the studio."


"Intern or no, you really don't look like a chemist. You're geeky, sure...
but not in the right way."

She had me there. "Technically, I'm not working for the studio right now. I
really want to find the Turtles. I'm trying to help someone out who's got
caught up in this whole mess. They may be the key to proving she had nothing
to do with it."

If April knew who I was talking about, she didn't let on. As she poured
coffee into two mugs she kept talking. "I wish I could help. Thing is, they
got back from the protest shaken. The police had already spoken to them and
something must've been said. They didn't tell me anything, not even Mike and
we share a lot." She noticed my raised eyebrow. "Not like that! They're just
friends. I may be a Toon but to get... intimate with a non-humanoid... You
don't think I'm a bigot do you?"

I shook my head. "Each to their own," I said with a smile. "I was talking
to Mickey the other day and he says he wouldn't go near any female Toon who
wasn't, at the very least, a rodent. Bender's the same with robots, although
after a few beers he's eyeing up Piglet behind the bar. I haven't the heart
to tell him Piglet's a guy."

April laughed. "So you know a few Toons, huh, Phil?" She didn't seem to think
I'd lied about my name. I decided to keep it that way. "But no. We're friends
but they didn't tell me where they were going. Last night they must have
packed their bags into the van and left while I was asleep. I wish I could
tell you more."

She didn't seem to be lying. Only problem was, I'd already believed one known
liar today. Maybe two. Just because Alice was crazy, didn't let Ariel off the
hook. I knew that, as much as I wanted to deny it. I swallowed a mouthful of
coffee. "So any idea what they were actually protecting at the lab?"

"They never said," April replied after swallowing. "But from the name, I
don't think you'd be far wrong if you said it specialised in ink for Toons."

I'd never considered the idea of Toons being produced in such a way. I'd
always pictured a group of artists, poised over a canvas, carefully etching
out all of the intricate details of each individual Toon. The eyes that gave
the finished product a sense of wistfulness, the curves that rendered them a
sexpot, the shit-eating grin that suggested the inherent wackiness. And then,
through that wonderful process we call Toonimation, they come to life,
imbibed with the personality drawn into them. But that there are factories
churning out the ink that gives them life? Did that mean there are production
lines of machines jotting out Toons these days? The twenty-first century
continued to horrify me.

"I'm afraid that's all I've got," April apologised. "I want to know where
they've got to as well. I'm worried. Sure, they take up space in my apartment
and they leave the place in a mess, but we've been friends for twenty years."

I looked around at the living room from the vantage point of the kitchen.
"I'll do my best," I said. "But while I'm here, I could help you clean up.
It's the least I could do..."

April seemed shocked. "I couldn't let you do that."

I flashed her a charming grin. "It'd be my pleasure."

* * *

It took nearly two hours and several more cups of black coffee to get it done
and, other than the sofa with its distinctive shell-shaped alcoves, you could
hardly tell that anyone other than a clean freak lived here.

April sat herself down once we were finished. Before I got onto the sofa
myself, I couldn't help but catch a glimpse of this hot Toon woman's

"God," she began. "After all that I'm still so wired. You know what I mean?"

Another glance at her chest and I couldn't help but agree, although not in
the way she meant. I just nodded.

"Must be the coffee. Need to work it off." She looked me up and down. "So you
said you're not actually working for the studio by coming here?"

"Well, no. I'm on my own time," I responded warily. I already had a feeling
I knew where this was going. Toon or not, I'd been there while she poured her
heart out in a way she probably hadn't been able to in months. Years, maybe.
And then I helped her clean up the apartment. Okay, so it was really so I
could try and find some clue as to where the Turtles could've gone, but in
detective mode I was quickly becoming quite a catch.

April began to move closer to me, her arms stretching along the back of the
sofa behind me. "So, you've got nowhere to be?"

"Not as such," I smiled.

She leaned towards me, her lips parting just enough to give me a glimpse of
her tongue that seemed to be crying out to touch mine. I moved into the kiss
and was sudden pushed back onto the sofa. April was on top of me, grasping
my hair tight as she kissed me with abandon. She began to grind her crotch
against mine, stirring me to attention.

I was taken aback. It really must've been a while since she'd last gotten
laid. I reached up towards her chest, my hands drifting over her firm breasts
as I began to unzip her jumpsuit to get a better look at what had been
teasing me these past few hours.

April's kisses moved to my neck. I inhaled suddenly as she bit me. "Sorry,"
the Toon smiled. "I couldn't help myself."

"Carry on." I'd managed to get the zip down to her stomach and pulled the top
of her outfit down over her shoulders. She slip her arms out and sat on top
of me, her bare breasts just inches from my face.

I leaned in and began to suck on her nipples, leaving a trail of kisses along
her chest as I moved from one to the other. April's gasps became louder. Her
hands caressed the back of my head, encouraging me. "Just like that," she
whispered. "Keep doing that."

Her free hand began to unbuckle her belt so the rest of her jumpsuit could be
removed. I pulled away from her breasts for a moment, kissing her hard before
manoeuvring myself from underneath. We were both on our feet as I slid her
clothes off leaving her entirely naked. No underwear. What was she expecting
when she got that call from me?

We embraced again, pulling apart only so April could begin to strip me. Our
naked bodies pressed together as hands moved rapidly, exploring each other
intimately. Tits. Ass. Pussy. Finally, she grasped my cock in her hand and
began pumping. The more I thought about it, the more I realised I could never
go back to fucking humans. Her small Toon hand felt so good around my shaft.

Wrapping my arms around her waist, I lifted her up. She clasped her legs
around me, carefully lowering herself onto my cock. Her hands moved around
my neck as she hung back. I braced myself against the nearest wall as we
started to move in unison. I was all the way inside her throbbing pussy,
thrusting upwards as she gyrated onto me. Her eyes were closed. It probably
didn't matter who it was fucking her. She just needed it so badly. What guy,
human or Toon, would want to come back to an apartment with messy, unemployed
anthropomorphic Toon Turtles?

April was using my body to let out all her frustration. Her whole form bucked
wildly against me. The sound of her dripping pussy squelching every time she
lowered herself onto my cock was driving me wild.

I lifting her across the room I lowered her onto the end of the sofa, still
thrusting deep inside as I went. I pulled out only long enough to turn her
over, her ass pointing up into the air, before plunging back into her pussy.
Her moans became louder and louder as I pounded her relentlessly. She grabbed
a nearby cushion and buried her face in it as our passions burned with
increasing intensity, her muffled exclamations fanning the flames.

I took a handful of her hair, and pulled her head back. I wanted to hear
this, I realised. "Ooooh! God yes! Fuck me like that!" April screamed. "Just
like that! Keep doing what you're doing! I want to feel you all the way
inside me!"

It took everything I had not to cum there and then! I reached around and
grabbed her tits. Her nipples were hard to the touch. My fingers toyed with
them us I pulled her up so she was standing at an angle to me, her legs still
braced by the arm of the sofa. I leaned forward and began kissing and sucking
at the soft skin of her neck. One hand continued to massage her breasts. The
other moved downwards, over her smooth, flawless stomach to her pussy. I
rubbed her clit, rolling my fingers over it until she shuddered around my

April's hands moved behind, pushing me away. I slid out of her pussy as she
fell to her knees in front of me. "If you're going to try and help find the
boys and bring them back, this may be my last chance to do this for a while,"
she smiled. Her mouth engulfed my cock which was still slick with her juices.
"Mmmmmmm..." she moaned as she took all of my length in after only a few

One hand cupped my balls while the other jerked the end of my shaft. It was
too much. I felt myself unload my hot, sticky cum into April's mouth. She
coughed, taken my surprise by the torrent that shot along her tongue and down
her throat. She took my cock out of her mouth and swallowed. A little streak
of cum still connected her lip to me. She lapped that up. "You could've
warned me you were going to do it so soon," she chastised me.

"Sorry," I shrugged. "It caught me unawares too."

April smiled up at me. "Sure it did." I didn't think she believed me.

* * *

I held her for a while, dozing a little but also chatting about how long it
had been she'd last gotten laid. It turned out she'd been in a relationship
with the Toon who played Shredder in the old Ninja Turtles show but, as these
things do, it fizzled out over time. I was assured he was a nice guy "but you
know how these things are..."

I nodded. "I guess I do. And that was it?"

"I've met a few human guys at clubs around LA but they only want me because
I'm 'that chick from the Ninja Turtles'. It's not as flattering as you'd
think." She sighed, then continued: "I'm not so welcome at the VIP places
nowadays. Not so big anymore. So I just work in the coffee place here in
the Leet and spend my nights reading bad romance novels."

"I've got a feeling things are going to change soon," I said, feeling
genuinely optimistic. "If nothing else, the drama around the protests might
make people wake up and realise what the studios have done to so many Toons.
You could find work and a guy before you know it."

"And what about you?" April teased.

Despite the grin on her face, that question brought up a lot more than I
wanted to. What about me? I'd spent the last few weeks screwing my way around
Toon Town's hottest but the only time I'd started to think of it as any more
than sex, I was unsure if the girl was a murderer! And why would anyone as
famous as Ariel want anything to do with me? I was just a human intern who'd
be thrust back into the real world in a year's time.

The look on my face must've been too serious. April playfully punched me in
the arm to ease the tension. "I was just kidding!" She leaned forward and
kissed me. "But while you're still here... If you want to do it again..."

I did.

* * *

By the time I got back to my apartment I reeked of sex. How April or even
Alice hadn't noticed was anyone's guess. I hadn't changed my clothes since
the day before. At least there was no blood got on my shirt after the
incident at the Ink & Paint Club.

The caffeine from the bottomless cups of coffee I'd drunk at April's was
starting to wear off. I just wanted to crawl into bed and sleep for at least
a month. Doubts about my investigation were starting to plague me. Why the
hell was I doing this anyway? What did I owe anyone? Was Ariel just using my
enthusiasm for both her and the whole detective thing just to find an alibi?

In the morning, if I felt up to it, I was going to look deeper into the
Turtles' disappearance. They were working security at a lab that possibly
produced the ink for making Toons. Ink, ironically, that may have made their
replacements, the very replacements that forced them to work at the lab in
first place. A vicious cycle.

Thirty minutes later I emerged from a shower feeling a little more human but
still exhausted. It was off to bed for me once my hair dried. Until then I
was going to make some notes about what I'd discovered before I forgot it

As I stepped into my living room, a towel still wrapped around my waist, the
doorbell rang. I wasn't expecting anyone. At least not that I remembered. I'd
been so busy these last few days that it probably wouldn't have surprised me.

Opening the door expecting to tell whoever it was to leave, I received an
unexpected surprise.

Before me stood a dark haired Toon woman dressed in a stylish purple suit.
She had a purse over her shoulder and a notepad grasped in one hand. "Mr.
Dickinson?" she asked. I nodded. "Lois Lane. I'm with the Toon Town

I knew exactly who she was. She'd been in the Superman Animated show some
years back but when it ended she found herself making only a few brief
appearances in its Justice League spin-off. Instead of moping she went to
school to study journalism. Her character had given her a taste for it and,
while being drawn with the right instincts for the job, she didn't have the
training. So she worked her ass off and got a job at a Toon Town newspaper.
I'd read a few reports by her in copies of the Enquirer left in the bar I
drank at with Mickey, Mario and Bender.

I scratched the back of my head with one hand while holding the towel up with
the other. "I'm kinda in the middle of something right now..."

Lois seemed to glance down for a moment, then moved her eyes back to my face.
"Can't come back later," she began, suddenly incredibly matter-of-fact. No
hint of her wandering eyes just a few seconds before. "I have to file this
before midnight if I want it in the morning's edition and it's got to be
written up. It won't take long."

"What's it about?" I asked warily. I had a feeling what the answer would be.

"The murder at the studio. I've got a lead on something and you're just the
person I want to talk to."

"Me?" I asked with a sigh. "I suppose 'No comment' right from the get-go is
going to work?"

Lois frowned. "At least let me ask you the questions first."

"The official studio line is 'no comment'," I started. I was so exhausted I
could hardly suppress a yawn. "This job's worth too much to me for me to even
think of going beyond that."

"I won't mention any names, if that helps. There are leaks out of the studio
all the time. Already got a few anonymous reports on this. It wouldn't be
traced back to you."

I sighed. "Come in." Maybe I'd be able to use her to find out something that
I didn't already know; something that would help my own investigation out.
"I just need to get changed."

Lois smiled and stepped inside my apartment. The sight of a Toon moving
around a human backdrop was as disconcerting as ever. Her animated form stood
out against my own little world.

I stepped into the bedroom, leaving the door slightly ajar so she could hear
me. I pulled off the towel. "So what do you want to ask me?" I called out to
her, wandering around naked, looking for clean clothes.

There was a brief pause as Lois flicked through her notes. "Ah right," she
muttered, before raising her voice: "Am I right in hearing that you were at
the protest?"

"Yup. The boss probably didn't want me there, but..."

"The boss being Robert Maroon?"

I pulled on a pair of boxers as I called out through the gap in the door.
"That's the one. You see..."

Lois was quick to interrupt. "Is it also true that he sent you to the
headquarters of the..." She stopped to read. "Million Toon March... to
attempt to bring it to a peaceful conclusion?"

How did she know about that? Who could have told her? The only people in the
room at that point were Maroon, Droopy and myself. Maroon was the one who
insisted we not say anything to the press and Droopy was too obsessed with
following the rules of whatever job he was given to let that be known.

Clearly, my answer was too long in coming. "Is that correct?"

"I spoke with them, yeah."

"Them?" Lois asked. "This is... Poison Ivy and Batgirl?"

A pair of jeans were on next, followed by my socks. I poked my head around
the door. "They were the ones in charge." I was trying my best to be elusive,
but I just didn't have it in me. April had seen right through the lie I'd
told her.

"And what were you expected to say to convince them to change their course of

The tone of her voice suggested she knew exactly what was said, and what was
meant to remain unsaid. But how? I just couldn't figure it out. "Just that it
would make things worse for them. That kind of thing."

"Mm-hmm." Lois looked up at me. The side of her mouth curled into a half
smile as she looked over my still naked upper body. "And it had nothing to
do with the reputation you have amongst female Toons?"

"What?" I exclaimed. "I don't know what you're talking about!"

Lois flicked through her notes. "So you know nothing about the date you went
on with Princess Jasmine... several weeks ago?"

"Date is a very... specific word," I tried.

"Right." From her reaction I could see that that hadn't worked. "You were at
the Toonies with Princess Belle too. That's public record. You don't deny

"That was a studio thing," I responded coolly. "They asked me to accompany
her. It was work."

"You don't think they could have got someone more famous to do that? Someone
more... photogenic." From the way she was hungrily looking at me I didn't
think I was entirely unattractive to her. She continued: "No, I think she
requested it be you. What Belle wants, Belle gets. And she wanted you because
of what she heard from Jasmine."

"Okay," I sighed. "You've got me there." I stared right into her blue eyes.
"Jasmine found me to be an incredibly charming conversationalist. She told
Belle that my opinions on current affairs are just to die for. How could she
turn that down?"

Lois looked back at her notes. "Touché," she muttered under her breath. Her
eyes shot up to me again, like a tiger about to finally pounce. "But you were
also seen in the Red Lion Pub with Prince Eric not long after the Toonies. A
Toon on his own in a human bar stands out, as does the human who comes to
collect him."

I considered my response for a few moments. Was she hinting I was a suspect?
Nothing she'd said so far even suggested that was on her mind. "I guess it
won't hurt to say he was a drunk. You guys pretty much knew that anyway,
right?" Lois nodded. I carried on: "There was a report that he was there. The
studio wanted to save its reputation. His too, I guess. They wanted him
escorted out of there and I was the closest to the scene."

Lois scribbled away in her notepad. She stopped a few seconds after I'd
finished talking. Her eyes moved down my body again before whipping back up
to look me in the eyes. "And this was... two days before he was killed?"

I had to think about that. A whole heap of events and lack of sleep in the
intervening period had blurred my concept of time. "I guess so," I replied.

Her eyes on me began to get the better of me. They were less accusatory than
her questions suggested they should be. I moved over to the sofa where Lois
was sitting and plopped myself down next to her, trying to get a peek at her
notes. She pulled away with a smile on her face. "No peeking," she said,
trying to sound austere but failing.

I grinned at her. "But yeah, I think it was about two days before. I lost
track of time..."

"Convenient," Lois replied. Her smile was gone again. How she was able to
switch between serious reporter and flirtatious minx, I had no idea. It was
driving me crazy. "Following the murder... You've been working with a private
eye hired by the studio."

How did she know that? Again, only myself, Maroon and Mitchelson knew about
this. And the whole board of directors, of course. Still, there were only two
faces to pop in both of these scenarios, and I knew I wasn't the one telling
the press anything. What the hell was Maroon up to? He was telling us all to
avoid the press - I wasn't exactly doing a great job in that respect - and
yet he was the most obvious source of the information Lois Lane had.

"I've been working there as the eyes and ears of the studio, yeah," I said.
Well, if Maroon can be such a hypocrite, why should I avoid giving her what
she wanted to know? Within reason, of course.

Lois nodded. I suddenly realised she hadn't been making notes for several
minutes. "And to use your... relationship with the Princesses to get him
access to their inner circle?"

"Do you have any idea how underhanded that sounds?" I responded, aghast. "I'd
never do that to them!"

Lois moved a little closer to me. "So is it true?"

I looked at her inquisitively. "Is what true?"

"What happened between you and the Princesses?"


"Why else would you get so defensive?"

"They're nice girls," I informed her matter-of-factly. Well, Jasmine and
Mulan were. Ariel seemed to be. I had no idea what to think of Belle. The
less said about Cinderella and Aurora the better.

"I knew it!" Lois exclaimed. "Sometimes I actually wish I had the gossip
column in the paper, instead of a real job. Because this is just too juicy
to be true."

"I didn't even say anything," I protested. "I don't know why you're jumping
to such conc..."

My final syllables didn't emerge. Lois' lips were locked with mine. Her
notepad was tossed aside and her arms entwined themselves around my neck.
The kiss lingered for several moments as our tongues carefully played with
each other. Lois pulled away, suddenly distancing herself from her actions.
"I'm sorry," she began.

"So you should be," I joked. "I was expecting you to be pumping me for
information not..." I gave her just the opening she wanted.

"I can pump you in another way. If you want."

"What happened to the serious reporter?" I asked. That questions had
disappeared pretty quickly, after all.

Lois smiled at me. "You know you've got quite a reputation around Toon Town,
right? Sure, nothing's confirmed but everyone knows there's something between
you and the Princesses. And Batgirl and Ivy too. There's rumours around the
studio that Kim Possible has been with a human guy and it's not exactly hard
to figure out who that would be." Her right hand traced a line from my neck
down my chest and stomach to my pants. "It's a big deal. There's never been
a massively publicised relationship between a Toon celebrity and human, or
even a human celebrity and a Toon before. If it got out it'd be big news. The
only thing saving you is that the press is all over the murder."

"I guess if the stories were true, I got quite a save there. Right?"

"You? Hardly!" Lois laughed. Her face edged closer to mine. I could feel the
heat from her lips against my own. "The Princesses, now that's a different
story. They're supposed to be role models and, thankfully, the media's let
them go up til now. For the most part. The gossip columns usually have
something but it never sticks." She kissed me again; quickly; then pulled
away. "For some reason, with you they've let their guards down. Within weeks
there'd have been torrents of stories about the 'Man-Swapping Princesses'.
Who knows what it would've done to them. Eric's murder has given them a

"Well, kind of," I began. I moved in closer to steal a kiss of my own. Lois
pulled back quickly. She was on a roll.

"You mean people think Ariel did it? Well, yes. There is that. But that could
take her down, not the whole group. It won't speak highly of them that one of
their own is a convicted killer - and you don't hear of many Toon killings,
even in this day and age - but they could survive. If it turns out they're
just a bunch of loose sluts... sorry... then that could destroy them. The
studio would lose a fortune in merchandising rights, never mind the

"Don't you think that would add a juicy layer to the murder story? Nothing
goes better with violence than a bit of sex." Just thinking about how I could
dragged into all of this terrified me. I was just a normal guy. There was
suddenly a good chance I'd be at the centre of what was quickly becoming the
biggest story to hit the Toon community in years! In all my focus on
investigating the murder itself, I was beginning to forget the role I played
in the whole thing. And that it was a guaranteed media circus!

Lois continued to stroke my chest. "That's the thing, isn't it?" she smiled.
"There is a way you can hold off, or even stop, that part of the story
getting out. Isn't there?"

Well, that was her motivation. Not that it surprised me. "So it's sex for

Lois frowned. "Well if you put it that way..." Her face lit up again. "Yes."

"And who said there was no integrity in the media today!" I quipped.

I was exhausted. I'd slept with three Toons already today and I'd hardly
gotten any sleep. There was no way I could keep this kind of lifestyle up!
I'd never been a particularly prolific lover before I got involved in the
affairs of Toon Town. I could count the number of human girls I'd slept
with on one hand. There was something about this place that was changing
me. It seemed like it was for the better, but now I was embroiled in a
twisted saga of murder, blackmail and prostitution I wasn't so sure.

Still, I had to muster up my energy for one last blow out. For the sake of
my reputation, and Jasmine and Mulan's. I grabbed Lois around the waist and
lunged into a kiss. We explored each other for a moment, then broke away,
panting. I pushed her jacket over her shoulders and began to fumble with the
dark-haired Toon's blouse. "Just rip it open, for God's sake" Lois hissed. I
obeyed. Buttons flew everywhere accompanied by tiny "ptooee" sounds. A purple
bra covered her small breasts. She was already unfastening it before I had
the chance to awkwardly try it myself.

She threw it onto the floor and thrust her chest towards my face. I began
to run my tongue over her breasts, lapping at the pert little orbs, before
finally focusing on her small, pink nipples. Lois gasped as I bit them
gently one by one, then took the back of my head and pushed me closer
towards her. I hungrily licked at her nipples as they became more erect.
The Toon reporter was soon moaning loudly when I ran my tongue down the
whole length of her body, over her belly until I reached the top of her
skirt. Again, she didn't let me waste any time. She pulled it down and
kicked it off across the room. A wet patch was visible through the
cotton-esque material that made her panties. I could just about make out
the shape of her pussy lips.

I didn't even try to pull them off, just pulled them aside to reveal her
hot, pink lips. Lois' hands manipulated my head again, pushing me into her.
My tongue worked her clit and sopping wet hole until her head was thrashing
from side to side, her groans louder than before. I could feel her hands
move away, her nails raking up my back. It drove me wild. The last of my
exhaustion faded as my cock came to full attention.

Her arms were moving all over my back pulling me up so I could face her. "I
want you to fuck me like Superman never could," she whispered into my ear.
That was quite something to live up to. She'd already unzipped my pants and
pulled my cock out. I didn't even bother taking them off, just entering her
with one swift stroke. My thrusts were slow but hard at first, as I slid my
length all the way into Lois's cunt, making her call out with uncontrollable
desire. "Yesss..." the gorgeous Toon panted. "Stick your cock all the way
into me! Is that how a human cock feels? Ungh! Yeah! I wish I'd known that
before! Fuck me hard!" She started to force her body down onto my cock each
time I entered her, her passion building up to a massive crescendo.

"Get on your back," Lois hissed suddenly. "I've got an idea."

I obeyed, and soon she was on top, positioning her pussy just above my cock,
still slick with her juices. She lowered herself slowly onto me until I had
filled up her soaking wet pussy once more. I reached around and grabbed her
ass, squeezing it as I lifted her up and down on my manhood. Her small tits
bounced up and down with each plunge. From this angle, I could really
appreciate the gorgeous sight of my human cock entering her animated Toon
body. It drove me wild. The flesh-coloured ink of her skin contrasting to
mine made me seem blotchy in comparison. She was perfect, just like all Toon

Lois rode my cock for another few minutes, taking over control, grinding her
hips into my crotch. I couldn't take it any more. I felt that familiar surge
of cum building up inside me, ready to blast into her. "I'm gonna..." I
began. Too late. I could feel myself pumping and pumping until I filled her
body with my seed. Her pussy gripped my cock, milking it for all it was

That final burst of energy faded and my body began to feel like jelly. Lois
pulled herself off my cock and adjusted her panties. She moved a little,
resting on top of me, her head on my chest. "Yeah," she smiled ponderously.
"I think that'll do for now."

"For now?" I exclaimed. I knew I wasn't up for another round. Not today.
Maybe not this week. Maybe not even for the rest of my life! Well, okay. That
was an overstatement. But still!

"Until you do something else that requires a media cover up," Lois winked.

"I think that's going to happen pretty damn soon," I said. "Don't quote me
on this, but I'm working on something. An investigation."

Lois's eyes opened wide. Even for a Toon it was impressive. "Into the
murder?" I nodded. She was amazed. "Does the studio know anything about it?"
This time I shook my head. "How's it going?"

"I've got a few leads." I thought about it for a moment, then decided to
throw caution to the wind. "Look, you keep me out of the papers and I'll keep
you updated with what I find out. It may be a dead end but I think I'm onto

"Why are you doing this?" Lois asked. Suddenly it was as though a light bulb
blinked on above her head. With some Toons that would have actually happened.
Most humanoid Toons don't have that advantage. "It's one of the Princesses,
isn't it? It's not Ariel, is it? You're trying to clear her name?"

I shook my head. "It's not that." It was a lie, but one made convincing by
the truth I followed it with: "Again, don't quote me, but I'm not entirely
sure she's innocent anyway. But I know there's more to this than we're being
led to believe." Lois was enthralled. "Do we have a deal?"

She thought about it for a moment. "You're serious, aren't you?"

"Do we have a deal?" I repeated.

"Okay," the reporter nodded. "And in a similar vein of 'You scratch my back,
and I'll scratch yours,' I've got something for you. The Rabbits are flying
back from the Japanese Toon Town. They'll be arriving here tomorrow morning.
Don't know what they've been told but I've heard they want to speak to you."

To be continued...


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